“This is my secret,” he said. “I don’t mind what happens.” -Eckhart Tolle

With October comes the looming Halloween theme of fear. Everything get’s more spooky as the leaves change and the cold sets in. This month really got me thinking about what “fear” really means, not only in the sleeping with the light on sense but in our everyday lives. What are people really afraid of?

Yesterday, I walked into a library full of students and faculty I didn’t recognize. This was great because I go to a school with a little over 1,200 students so to not see a familiar face was a rarity. I decided last night before bed that I was going to ask twelve strangers what their ultimate fear in life was. Most people close to me have answered, “spiders” and that’s why I chose to interview strangers instead of friends. You see, when you ask someone close to you to reveal an area that is debilitating or an area of vulnerability about their lives, they aren’t as likely to open up. You’d think because you are so close that they’d want to reveal their weaknesses when in reality, it’s the exact opposite. The following list is compiled of testimonies of twelve willing people I stumbled across on a Wednesday morning:

1. “I won’t leave anything behind. That what I am working for won’t matter”

2. “I’m really afraid of dancing. Every time I get asked, I want to, I really do. Just couldn’t bear the humiliation if I did it wrong..”

3.“I’d have to say anything involving puppets or dolls… my sister used to have a lot of them in her room, I swear their eyes followed me”

4. “I fear death, honestly. You never know when things are going to happen”

5. “I dunno, It takes a lot to scare me. I’m pretty brave not gonna lie. Actually, bats. I really don’t like bats”

6. “Getting old. That’s scary”

7. “I don’t much like change. I think that’s probably what I’m most afraid of. Big changes”

8. “That one day I will look at these bookshelves, and realize I never took the time out to read but spent fifteen years working in a library”

9. “Not finding someone. I don’t mind living alone, but I would truly love to share my life with someone”

10. “Not learning enough to get a job. Actually getting a job, in general, I’ve never worked for anyone outside of my family so I hope I’m okay at it”

11. “I really get scared driving. Especially in the winter time, anything could go wrong in an instant”

12. That I will have spent the good parts of my life being too afraid to do the things I want. To look back and find that I’ve spent the majority of my life doing what I should and making other people happy before myself.

Interesting right? We all walk around and pass people who have all of these internal battles every day. All of these fears, some which you would never guess someone had. Number twelve was my own fear and while I have many, I hope to face them every day in order to avoid accepting them as my reality. Fear is a driving force which can either make us deeply miserable or make us successful. Having something to be afraid of gives me incentive every day to make sure I don’t let my fears overwhelm my abilities and true love for life. Each of these individuals shared what they were really afraid of, to me, a stranger. Some were easier than others to speak with but they each admitted there was something deep down which scared them. The worst thing about fear is that if we live under the umbrella of doubt it casts, we will never be able to step out from under it and feel the rain, feel our lives and what they are meant to truly be. So I urge you, remember that everyone around you is probably just as afraid if not more afraid of the things we struggle with every day. Our fears just amount to how much we are letting them control, it is up to us to do something about them.